I've been sick this week

Last Tuesday afternoon I felt an unusual pain at the lower back of my head. After a while I was already palpitating so I hastily went to the clinic near my office. The doctor checked my blood pressure and it was 120/80. I normally have 90/70 BP so there was a significant pressure increase but she told me it's still within the normal range so nothing to worry. It still feared me though. Anyway she also scolded me when I told her I have not undergone through ambulatory ECG and 2D Echo yet, which was supposedly due October last year when I was having episodes of heart palpitations.

What I felt according to her is due to stress so she advised me to have some rests. When I went back to my office I called Mona and invited her over dinner. We met at Bugis MRT and munched at Yoshinoya. After Mona's work and lovelife storytelling (haha!) we decided to go home. While buying pasalubong for Aldee (Mona's beau), I felt dizzy and wanted to vomit so I held tight of Mona's hands while she still continues her unending love story (LOL) not knowing of my condition. I was still in that state when we are about to part ways so i decided to tell her everything. She told me to text her if anything happens. Hence I took a cab and asked uncle (the taxi driver) to drop me off at the clinic near my house. The GP told me to relax and gave me a muscle relaxant, fever and pain and anti-giddiness and vomiting tablest and a medical certificate so I could rest the following day. I am alone for 2 weeks so Jay asked me to call Mona to accompany me that night.

It felt that I rode in a roller coaster the days after. I couldn't stand for long time because I was giddy, I easily got tired and last night I had a fever and a 30-second chest pain.

I feel better now and I want to thank the Lord. His goodness has truly sustained me. I've always felt better after praying. But I know that He wants to teach me something here. I realized that He wanted to correct my habits - He wants me to watch what I eat (I've been eating fried and fatty foods lately, not to mention that I also consume fast foods at regular basis) and He also wanted me to put right my sleeping patterns (I usually sleep at around 1 to 2 am and would wake at 2 pm during weekends). My mind also has suppressed a lot of thoughts recently-about my work, the wedding, my family back home, the future-some are excitements, some are fears, some are disappointments. I was keeping all of them until they all gushed out. It saddens me to think that I had to undergo through all of these when I have my God - I have my big God who could push me up and save from being drowned. I admit that sometimes I forget to share my thoughts and completely give my loads to Him. Sometimes I would just filter what to pass to Him and I learned that the Lord doesn't love the idea. He desires for a complete submission so He could fully control everything.

I also want to thank Jay. I don't want to sound bias here but I want to give him the best fiance/boyfriend/husband-to-be award. I've been alone for 2 weeks (my relatives flew back to Philippines for a 2-week vacay) but I never felt unaccompanied. He never failed to check on me and make sure I am out of harm's way (he also had to watch me sleeping via skype). I love him more than ever. I always thank the Lord for his life, and I believe he'll be the best husband I could ever have. :-)